|
|
9月29日
One day , the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.
They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip , the father asked his son , "How was the trip?"
"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.
"Oh yeah , " said the son.
"So , tell me , what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.
"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us , but they serve others.
We buy our food , but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us , they have friends to protect them."
The boy's father was speechless.
Then his son added , "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."
Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.
Appreciate every single thing you have , especially your friends!
Pass this on to friends and acquaintances and help them refresh their perspective and appreciation.
"Life is too short and friends are too few." 9月28日
Random Thoughts of the Day
a.. More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my
own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.
a.. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.
a.. I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink
to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks
when they've invented the lighter?
a.. Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're
going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be
going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction
from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or
phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no
one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching
directions on the sidewalk.
a.. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was
younger.
a.. The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This
recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be
ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.
a.. Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it
wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would
magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or
FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.
a.. There is a great need for sarcasm font.
a.. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the f*** was going on when I first saw
it.
a.. I think everyone has a movie that they love so much; it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90
minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the
right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a
millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really
gets it.
a.. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
a.. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand
than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
a.. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die.
a.. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to
finish a text.
a.. A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the
spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.
a.. Was learning cursive really necessary?
a.. Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else
to say".
a.. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and
hunger.
a.. Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying.
a.. My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads.
Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about
the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.
a.. Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart",
all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
a.. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
a.. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up
to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
a.. While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.
a.. MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood.
a.. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died.
a.. I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water.
a.. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get
dirty, and you can wear them forever.
a.. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
a.. Bad decisions make good stories
a.. Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the
Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!
a.. Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every
year?
a.. If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring
would probably just be completely invisible.
a.. Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go
around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly
nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from; this shouldn't be a
problem....
a.. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive
for the rest of the day.
a.. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection.
a.. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are
going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
a.. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I
did not make any changes to.
a.. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this
ever.
a.. I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people
watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they
judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching
this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room.
Will we still be friends after this?'
a.. While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for
China and USA. No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that
when Chinese athletes don't win, they are executed.
a.. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Darnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to
voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
a.. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
a.. When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet
stalking.
a.. I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
a.. Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising
speed for pedophiles...
a.. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
a.. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.
a.. It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.
a.. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.
a.. I think that if, years down the road when I'm trying to have a kid,
I find out that I'm sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the
fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.
a.. Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do
to with it.
a.. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the
Donkey - but I'd bet my a$$ everyone can find and push the Snooze button
from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every
time...
a.. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would
happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?
a.. It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and
the link takes me to a video instead of text.
a.. I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit.
a.. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
a.. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.
a.. The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw
they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone
at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then
estimate d that there must be at least four people eating to require such a
large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like
being made to feel like a fat b@st@rd before dinner. 9月27日 NOW THAT WE ARE 1 QUARTER FROM THE END OF 2009, I WONDER HOW 2010 WILL BE....NOT LIKE "SPACE ODESSY 2010" FOR SURE.
I HOPE THAT IT GETS BETTER.
TOP TEN THOUGHTS FOR 2009
Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection,
make him a sandwich.
Number 7
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the
Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of
nothing.
Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00 and a substantial tax cut
saves you $0.30?
Number 2
In the '60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2009:
We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the
millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't got a clue as to
where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we
should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration...
And the BONUS thought for today "Life is like a jar of jalapenos. What you
do today, might burn your ass tomorrow".
9月24日 When I was a wee ''tike'', my mom liked to make breakfast food for supper every now and then..And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work.
On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burned biscuits in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his biscuit, smile at my mom and ask me how my day was at school. I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that biscuit and eat every bite!
When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the biscuits. And I'll never forget what he said: "Baby, I love burned biscuits."
Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his biscuits burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, "Your Mom put in a hard day at work today and she's really tired. And besides - a little burnt biscuit never hurt anyone!"
You know, life is full of imperfect things.....and imperfect people. What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults- and choosing to celebrate each other's differences- is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.
And that's my wish for you today. That you will learn to take the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your life.
We could extend this to any relationship. In fact! Understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife, parent-child, siblings, business or friendship!
"Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket! Keep it in your own."
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have. 9月23日
Gun Confiscation is Beginning--Senate Bill SB-2099
HR45 Gun Owners Watch Out
Concerning the Blair-Holt proposed legislation: Senate Bill SB-2099 will require us to put on our 2009 1040 federal tax form all guns that you have or own. It may require fingerprints and a tax of $50 per gun.
In November, our lying president promised he was not going after our Second Amendment rights. This bill was introduced on Feb. 24. This bill will become public knowledge 30 days after it is voted into law. This is an amendment to the Internal Revenue Act of 1986. This means that the Finance Committee can pass this without the Senate voting on it at all.
The full text of the proposed amendment is on the U.S. Senate homepage, <http://www.senate.gov// You can find the bill by doing a search by the bill number, SB-2099.
You know who to call; I strongly suggest you do.
Please send a copy of this e-mail to every gun owner you know.
<http://WWW.opencongress.org/bill/111-h45/text
Congress is now starting on the firearms confiscation bill. If it passes, gun owners will become criminals if you don't fully comply.
It has started.
Very Important for you to be aware of a new bill HR 45 introduced into the House. This is the Blair Holt Firearm Licensing & Record of Sale Act of 2009.
Even gun shop owners didn't know about this because the government is trying to fly it under the radar.
To find out about this - go to any government website and type in HR 45 or Google HR 45 Blair Holt Firearm Licensing & Record of Sales Act of
2009. You will get all the information.
Basically this would make it illegal to own a firearm - any rifle with a clip or ANY pistol unless:
It is registered - You are fingerprinted - You supply a current Driver's License - You supply your Social Security # - You will submit to a physical & mental evaluation at any time of their choosing - Each update change or ownership through private or public sale must be reported and costs $25 - Failure to do so you automatically lose the right to own a firearm and are subject up to a year in jail. There is a child provision clause on page 16 section 305 stating a child-access provision. Gun must be locked and inaccessible to any child under 18.
They would have the right to come and inspect that you are storing your gun safely away from accessibility to children and fine is punishable for up to
5 yrs. In prison.
If you think this is a joke - go to the website and take your pick of many options to read this. It is lengthy. But, more and more people are becoming aware of this. Pass the word along. Any hunters in your family pass this along.
This is just a "termite" approach to complete confiscation of guns and disarming of our society to the point we have no defense - chip away a little here and there until the goal is accomplished before anyone realizes it.
This is one to act on whether you own a gun or not.
If you take my gun, only the criminal will have one to use against me.
HR 45 only makes me/us less safe.
<http://Thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query/z?c111:H.R.45:
<http://WWW.opencongress.org/bill/111-h45/show
<http://WWW.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h111-45
Please.. Copy and send this out to EVERYONE in the USA , whether you support the Right to Bear Arms or not.. YOUR rights are next. Government is taking away our right to choose, as well as the right to defend ourselves from intruders.
9月22日
The nun at Hooters
|
A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while 'the lights would turn off.'
Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.
She walked up to the bartender, and asked, 'May I please use the restroom?
The bartender replied, 'OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf.'
'Well, in that case, I'll just look the other way,' said the nun.
So the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.
After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause. !
She went to the bartender and said, 'Sir, I don't understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?'
'Well, now they know you're one of us,' said the bartender, 'Would you like a drink?'
'No thank you, but, I still don't understand,' said the puzzled nun.
'You see,' laughed the bartender, 'every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out.
Now, how about that drink?' |
|
| 9月21日
An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was
getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession.
Like many young men his age, the boy didn't really know what he wanted to do, and he didn't seem too concerned about it. One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy's room and placed on his study table four objects.
1. A Bible.
2. A silver dollar.
3. A bottle of whiskey.
4. And a Playboy magazine.
'I'll just hide behind the door,' the old preacher said to himself. 'When he comes home from school today, I'll see which object he picks up.
If it's the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a
blessing that would be!
If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a business man, and that would be okay, too.
But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a no-good drunken bum, and Lord, what a shame that would be.
And worst of all if he picks up that magazine he's
going to be a skirt-chasing womanizer.'
The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son's foot-steps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room.
The boy tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to
leave the room he spotted the objects on the table..
With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them. Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink, while he admired this month's centerfold.
'Lord have mercy,' the old preacher disgustedly
whispered. 'He's gonna run for Congress.
9月20日 Beatitudes For The Home
BLESSED are the husband and wife who continue to be affectionate, considerate, and loving after the wedding bells have ceased ringing.
BLESSED are the husband and wife who are as polite and courteous to one another as they are to their friends.
BLESSED are they who have a sense of humour, for this attribute will be a handy shock absorber.
BLESSED are they who love their mates more than any other person in the world and who joyfully fulfill their marriage vows of a lifetime of fidelity and mutual helpfulness to one another.
BLESSED are they who attain parenthood, for children are a heritage of the Lord.
BLESSED are they who remember to thank God for their food before they partake of it, and who set apart some time each day for the reading of the Bible and for prayer.
BLESSED are those mates who never speak loudly to one another and who make their home a place where seldom is heard a discouraging word.
BLESSED are the husband and wife who faithfully attend the worship service of the church and who work together in the church for the advancement of Christ's Kingdom.
BLESSED are the husband and wife who can work out problems of adjustments without interference from relatives.
BLESSED is the couple who has a complete understanding about financial matters and who has worked out a perfect partnership with all money under the control of both.
BLESSED are the husband and wife who humbly dedicate their lives and their home to Christ and who practice the teachings of Christ in the home by being unselfish, loyal, and loving.
Author Unknown
THANKS RIONA 9月14日
> 1) A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
> 2) There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in WV..
>
> 3) There are 10,000 types of spiders, and all 10,000 of them live in WV.
>
> 4) If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.
>
> 5) "Onced" and "Twiced" are words.
>
> 6) It is not a shopping cart, it's a buggy.
> 7) "Jaw-P?" means, "Did y'all go to the bathroom?"
> 8) People actually grow and eat okra.
>
> 9) "Fixinto" is one word.
> 10) There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there is
> supper...
> 11) Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when
> you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.
> 12) Backwards and forwards means, "I know everythin' bout you."
>
> 13) The word "jeet" is actually a phrase meaning, "Did you eat?"
> 14) You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it
is. You work until you're done or it's too dark to see...
> 15) You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH em.
>
> 16) You measure distance in minutes.
> 17) You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
> 18) All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable,
grain, insect, animal or county.
>
> 19) You know what a "Dawg" is.
> 20) You carry jumper cables in your car - for your own car.
>
> 21) You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Mustard, and ketchup.
>
> 22) The local papers cover national and international news on one page,
but require 6 pages for local gossip and high school football...
>
> 23) You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
>
> 24) You find 100 degrees "a bit warm."
> 25) You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, almost winter, and
> winter.
> 26) Going to Walmart is a favorite past time known as "goin' Walmartin" or
"off to Wally World."
>
> 27) You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good hog
> killin' weather.
> 28) Fried catfish is the other white meat.
> 29) We don't need no dang Driver's Ed... If our mama says we can drive,
we can drive dag-nabbit.
>
> 30) You understand these jokes and forward them to your WV friends and
those who just wish they were from WEST VIRGINIA!!!!! 9月11日
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
Keep reading-they get better!!!
WOMEN'S REVENGE
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. 'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.
MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes.'
He addressed the man,
'Can you name your wife's favorite flower?'
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered,
'I t's Pillsbury, isn't it?
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and
a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store
to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco
and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper .
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .. ......... so does she.
(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically,
'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'
WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men.....
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'
CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.
The husband said, 'You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides,
it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says
'HEBREWS'
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife
to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE),
he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM .'
He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight.
Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece
SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!!!!!!
| 9月10日
This is a must read for all Texans, used-to-be Texans, adopted Texans or wanna-be Texans,
JUST TEXAS
Pep , Texas 79353
Smiley , Texas 78159
Paradise , Texas 76073
Rainbow , Texas 76077
Sweet Home , Texas 77987
Comfort , Texas 78013
Friendship, Texas 76530
Love the Sun?
Sun City , Texas 78628
Sunrise , Texas 76661
Sunset, Texas 76270
Sundown, Texas 79372
Sunray , Texas 79086
Sunny Side , Texas 77423
Want something to eat?
Bacon , Texas 76301
Noodle , Texas 79536
Oatmeal , Texas 78605
Turkey , Texas 79261
Trout , Texas 75789
Sugar Land , Texas 77479
Salty, Texas 76567
Rice , Texas 75155
Pearland , Texas 77581
Orange , Texas 77630
And top it off with:
Sweetwater , Texas 79556
Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!
Detroit , Texas 75436
Cleveland , Texas 75436
Colorado City , Texas 79512
Denver City , Texas 79323
Klondike , Texas 75448
Nevada , Texas 75173
Memphis , Texas 79245
Miami , Texas 79059
Boston , Texas 75570
Santa Fe , Texas 77517
Tennessee Colony , Texas 75861
Reno , Texas 75462
Pasadena , Texas 77506
Columbus , Texas 78934
Feel like traveling outside the country?
Athens , Texas 75751
Canadian, Texas 79014
China , Texas 77613
Egypt , Texas 77436
Ireland , Texas 76538
Italy , Texas 76538
Turkey , Texas 79261
London , Texas 76854
New London , Texas 75682
Paris , Texas 75460
Palestine , Texas 75801
Moscow, Texas 75960
No need to travel to Washington D.C.
Whitehouse , Texas 75791
We even have a city named after our planet!
Earth , Texas 79031
We have a city named after our state
Texas City , Texas 77590
Exhausted?
Energy , Texas 76452
Cold?
Blanket , Texas 76432
Winters, Texas
Like to read about History?
Santa Anna , Texas
Goliad , Texas
Alamo , Texas
Gun Barrel City , Texas
Robert Lee , Texas
Need Office Supplies?
Staples, Texas 78670
Want to go into outer space?
Venus , Texas 76084
Mars , Texas 79062
You guessed it. It's on the state line.
Texline , Texas 79087
For the kids...
Kermit , Texas 79745
Elmo , Texas 75118
Nemo , Texas 76070
Tarzan , Texas 79783
Winnie , Texas 77665
Sylvester , Texas 79560
Twitty, Texas 79079
Other city names in Texas , to make you smile......
Frognot , Texas 75424
Bigfoot , Texas 78005
Hogeye , Texas 75423
Cactus , Texas 79013
Notrees , Texas 79759
Best, Texas 76932
Veribest , Texas 76886
Kickapoo , Texas 75763
Dime Box , Texas 77853
Old Dime Box , Texas 77853
Telephone , Texas 75488
Telegraph , Texas 76883
Whiteface , Texas 79379
And last but not least, the Anti-Al Gore City
Kilgore , Texas 75662
And our favorites...
Cut n Shoot, Texas
Gun Barrell City , Texas
Hoop And Holler, Texas
Ding Dong, Texas and, of course,
Muleshoe , Texas
Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas ...
If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas ;
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas ;
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas ;
If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas ;
If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas ;
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas ;
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas ;
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas ;
If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas ;
If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas ..
Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas .
1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles
2.. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles
3... El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas
4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos , July 4, 1883.
5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water. Destroyed by Hurricane Ike -2008!
6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston .
7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America
8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes.
9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.
10. The worst natural disaster in U.S. history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane, in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island .
11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20,1969, was " Houston ," but the space center was actually in Clear Lake City at the time.
12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island ..
13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43' in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979...
14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union ) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states.
15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old.
16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.
17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper..
18. Texas has had six capital cities:
Washington -on- the Brazos, Harrisburg , Galveston ,Velasco, West Columbia and Austin ..
19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U.S. which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet).
20. The San Jacinto Monument is the tallest free standing monument in the world and it is taller than the Washington monument.
21. The name ' Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas ..
22. The State Mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.).
23. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston .
Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie , Texas :
(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin' before God.
(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.
(7) No killin'.
(8) Watch yer mouth.
(9) Don't take what ain't yers.
(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff.
Y'all git all that?
THANKS JEWEL... 9月8日
It's not so much the speech that is concerning. A lot of presidents have done it before. IF, he keeps the politics out of it, it would be okay. However, it is the agenda that comes with the speech that has so many concerned.
http://www.ed.gov/teachers/how/lessons/prek-6.pdf
http://www.ed.gov/teachers/how/lessons/7-12.pdf
If this isn't indoctrination, I don't know what is.
How about the video at the bottom of this link. http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13249171 Some quotes "I pledge to be of service to Barack Obama," "I pledge allegiance to the funk, to the united funk of funkadelica," "For the planet, I pledge to flush only after a duece, never a single," "I pledge to sell my obnoxious car and buy a hybrid," "I pledge to end slavery."
Also, take a look at some of the other things that have come out. Obama is pushing to ratify the "Rigths of the Child Treaty". I haven't found the actual text of the treaty, if anyone has it, please shoot it my way. "Rigths of the Child Treaty" sounds harmless, but if what I've read is true, then it is nothing more than indoctrinating, propaganda BS. According to what I've read, there will be a social worker assigned to every child at birth that wil oversee everything the parents do. Also, protecting your children from pornography would violate their “freedom of expression” and “right to privacy.” Bringing your children to church against their will would violate their “freedom of thought, conscience and religion,” as would forbidding your child from joining a cult or gang. The CRC even establishes a framework for the child to seek government review for every parental decision as part of their “right to be heard,”(Taken from the link below)
http://www.canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/12360
Coley
RE: Would you want your kids to listen to President Obama on Sept 8th? I would.....
Hello,
I am not a huge fan of President Obama. However, I believe he has the right and duty to speak to our children. What I do have a problem with is the recommended student material suggesting my children write stories on how they can help President Obama succeed. Now they have crossed the line from being a non-political “study hard and stay in school” speech to indoctrination. I do not need any more indoctrination of my children in the public school system. It is out of line as it is! Why is it Democrats always think they have the right to try to teach my children what they want and tell me I have no right to teach (or even have) my beliefs?
Regards, Craig Ward, EA, MBA
Subject: RE: Would you want your kids to listen to President Obama on Sept 8th? I would.....
Hi Ralph!
I am a huge fan of President Obama! More power to him and to all of us! I am proud to have my girls listen to the President's speech geared toward children. Seems to me that he actually cares.
Happy Friday!
Zulema
Ralph,
I have to say: I will not let my children listen to him! Why? Working in a school system has shown me much compassion for the student's who had to move when only in school for 1 week. REASON: parent's lost their house, job, etc.... So now the children get uprooted to live with family member's some they never knew. It's quite sad! And now the president wants to tell them to stay in school. BAH!!!! He needs to see what he is doing to the economy. How does he want to have a student do well and excel when he or she does not have food, good clothes, has to work to help the family out, etc... Let alone the hygiene. Enough, already! Well, I guess you get my point. Not much of a political person as it is. So, I do not know all the logistics. I only go by what I am touched with. Anyway, Hope I answered your question? In other words, there is more to the situation which needs to be fixed, then just education.
Take Care,
Mona
Subject: FW: Would you want your kids to listen to President Obama on Sept 8th? I would.....
Date: Fri, 4 Sep 2009 09:11:15 -0600
Look at these, give me your point of view. I sometimes wonder how some got to be in office. Did he break some of his promises...you let me know...ralph
|
How many times has Jay Leno interviewed random people out in the street who had no clue of who the current president was? Maybe this way they'll learn something.
Obama goes back to schoolSend
·
Play Video AP – 11-year-old boy interviews Obama at White House
· Play Video Barack Obama Video:Will your kids hear Obama's speech? 11 News Houston
· Play Video Barack Obama Video:Ghosts of Clinton Past FOX News
· Play Video Barack Obama Video:All the President's Radicals FOX News
AP – President Barack Obama stands with Education Secretary Arne Duncan, left, and Health and Human Services …
More from The Yahoo! Newsroom:
· The Starting Point: Rising airline fees & Sharon Tate's killer
· Afghanistan: A losing fight?
· The Starting Point: Spiderman & the 2016 Games
· The Starting Point: Winter predictions, Vt. weddings & old dogs
· Journalism, the new politics?
· The Hammer does the hustle
· The Starting Point: Murder in Ga. & a princess remembered
· Week of the weird
More »
Thu Sep 3, 3:11 pm ET
On September 8, in what the Department of Education is touting as a "historic" speech, President Obama will be talking directly to students across the U.S., live on the White House website. But some parents and conservatives are blasting the president, calling the speech an excuse to brainwash American children.
Last month, in an interview with 11-year-old student reporter Damon Weaver, the president announced his big back-to-school plan:
"I'm going to be making a big speech to young people all across the country about the importance of education; about the importance of staying in school; how we want to improve our education system and why it’s so important for the country. So I hope everybody tunes in."
Secretary of Education Arne Duncan sent a letter to the nation's principals, inviting schools to watch the speech and included suggested classroom activities. But Jim Greer, the chairman of the Republican Party of Florida, came out swinging against the planned speech. An excerpt from his statement:
"The address scheduled for September 8, 2009, does not allow for healthy debate on the President's agenda, but rather obligates the youngest children in our public school system to agree with our President's initiatives or be ostracized by their teachers and classmates."
NBC spoke with Katie Gordon, a spokeswoman for the Florida Republican Party, who said the party's "beef" is with the accompanying lesson plans. The guide for pre-K through grade 6 suggests questions students think about during the speech, such as "What is the President trying to tell me? What is the President asking me to do?"
The plan for grades 7-12 includes a "guided discussion," with suggested topics: "What resonated with you from President Obama's speech? What is President Obama inspiring you to do?"
The Cato Institute, a public-policy research foundation, issued a press release entitled "Hey Obama, Leave Those Kids Alone," criticizing the "troubling buzzwords" in the lesson plans:
"It's one thing for a president to encourage all kids to work hard and stay in school – that's a reasonable use of the bully pulpit. It's another thing entirely, however, to have the U.S. Department of Education send detailed instructions to public schools nationwide on how to glorify the president and the presidency, and push them to drive social change."
Across the blogosphere, comments covered the spectrum, from critical to supportive, and from one student, a little anger:
"I sent my children to school to be educated NOT indoctrinated." — justamom
"The fact that people want to keep their kids from hearing the President of the United States encourage them to do well in school shows a true level of ignorance." — Firefey
"As an [sic] 9th grade student, I'd like to say that 1. I'm not sure why everyone is so scared that we'll all be brainwashed by the President ... 2. My school is one that is not allowing us to watch the speech, and quite frankly, I'm pissed." — Willbw
Both Presidents George Bush and Ronald Reagan both gave speeches aimed specifically at students that were nationally televised. In 1989, Bush delivered a televised anti-drug speech, and Reagan's 1986 commencement speech and Q&A session was "beamed over public television into 171 school districts," according to the L.A. Times.
It's worth noting that schools are, encouraged, not required, to air the speech. The Houston Chronicle reports that one Dallas school district is leaving the decision to individual teachers. Susan Dacus, spokeswoman for the Wylie school district, says parents who don't want their children to see it can opt out.
In an ironic twist, one Missouri school won't be airing the speech because of a lack of funding. Michelle Baumstark, spokeswoman for Columbia public schools, told the Columbia Daily Tribune, "We don’t have the funding or the equipment to support that type of broadcasting.” |
These were some of the comments I got after I ask a question of Obama speech that was today...these are some of the concerns that occured before his speech. My idea was to see concerns...anyway, I never have feel threaten by a speech by any president...Remember, what you teach your child is what he does. 9月7日
The Beauty of Mathematics and the Love of God! This is TOO cool!
Just the math part is good enough, the end is even better.
I bet you will NOT be able to read it without sending it on to at least one other person!
I received this e-mail and thought it was pretty cool! Keep scrolling it gets better.
Beauty of Mathematics!!!!!!!
1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321
1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111
9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888
Brilliant, isn't it?
And look at this symmetry:
1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321
Mind Boggling...
Now, take a look at this...
101%
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:
What Equals 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they
are giving more than 100%?
We have all been in situations where someone wants you to
GIVE OVER 100%...
How about ACHIEVING 101%?
What equals 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help
answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O- R- K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
And:
K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+ 5 = 96%
But:
A-T-T-I-T-U- D-E
1+20+20+9+20+ 21+4+5 = 100%
THEN, look how far the love of God will take you:
L-O-V-E-O-F- G-O-D
12+15+22+5+15+ 6+7+15+4 = 101%
Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:
While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, andAttitude will
get you there, It's the Love of God that will put you over the top! |
THANKS RIONA! 9月5日
A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him.
She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator.
He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw
Out.
Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.
Shortly before landing in New York, she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the gentleman who gave me the crabs in New Orleans, please raise your hand?"
Not one hand went up ... so she took them home and ate them.
Two lessons here:
1. Lawyers aren't as smart as they think they are.
2. Blonds aren't as dumb as some folks think.
9月4日 For those of us that are in our golden years, this list is a review of our lives and helps us cope with our lives. For those of you that are young, going through life with doubts and misgivings, read this list once in a while to be at peace with yourself. I am going to print the one that states that the best sex organ is the brain. I am going to pass it out to my grandkids. For those that are young parents, read the one that says that a child has only one childhood. Your actions affect your children forever. I don't know everything, but I learn something new everyday. Love you. VA
his is something we should all read at least once a week!
Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio
"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is
the most-requested column I've ever written."
My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents
will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument.. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is
all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never
blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to
you and no one else..
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an
answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save
it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow..
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this
matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles..
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or
didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's,we'd grab
ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."
Remember that I will always share my spoon with you!
Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves.
My Cousin Vicken, who wrote the first part after I had sent her this email. She is 20 yrs older than me. I know what she has been thru and life was not easy for her...She still takes care of grandchildren and great grandcildren in her home. Without them, she would not be as happy. She is a very strong woman, with compasion, demanding the best of all her children and she still gets a chance to see the world. Age hasn't slowered her down...I love my cousin even thou she is a democrat....
HOW TO INSTALL A SOUTHERN HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Splash a little watered down rusty red paint on the sidewalk.
5. Leave a note on your door that reads:
"Bubba,
Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer.
Be back in an hour.
Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the
mailman this morning and messed him up bad.
I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.
Better wait outside. Be right back.
Cooter"
|
工具 
